A Warrior to Be
by Erin Reya
Summary: Turan has come along a journal he kept when he was younger. It's time for a trip down memory lane. What had it been like growing up as son of the Redwall warrior?
1. Prologue

****

Disclaimer: I do not own Redwall. It belongs to the genius, Brian Jacques. The story and the characters are mine!

Dust motes swirled in the corners of the gatehouse, choking the allergies of the two young hares within. A new cloud of thick dust flew into the air as a large book was dropped heavily upon the desk inside.

"Goodness, Turan," came Tannia's voice, coughing through the dusty haze. "You'd think you would go through this stuff a little earlier."

"Most of it isn't mine, Tannia. It's not as if it would hold any meaning to me," was the indifferent reply. "But that isn't true. Do you realize how old some of these things are? Abbess Ayla would love to see these, I can tell you..." his voice trailed off thoughtfully.

They stopped talking for another few minutes, both of them rummaging through stuff, and stopping to leaf through them. They both were intrigued in the task, whether they were to admit it or not.

"Hey," Tannia spoke up again, walking over and sitting beside Turan on the bed in the gatehouse. "I think I found something of yours." She held a small booklet, looking something like a journal. She blew the dust from the top, right into Turan's face.

He coughed, waving his paw in front of his face, "Thanks for that." However, he took the journal from her and wiped a paw along the cover, looking carefully at it. It had a jet black book cover, not faded from the seasons. 

A carefully, wonderfully fashioned ivy design was pressed into the thick book cover material. It swirled and tangled about the outside of the journal. However, the most interesting part of the design was how the ivy vines parted and looped about to open out a picture in the front center. It was a sword.

A small smile tugged at the corner of the warrior's mouth as he examined the outside. You could just see the memories dancing past those bright blue eyes.

Tannia gave a laugh. "I knew it was yours! I never knew you wrote when you were younger, though."

"Well.." Turan said, still smiling. "My father suggested that I keep a journal. I never much liked the idea. But now.."

He pulled open the front cover, to the first page, where a young creature's rushed scrawl was spread along in lines, introducing the first day of the journal.

***********

A/N- This is just the prologue. Purely for reaction. Totally short. I need some input if this is a good idea or not. I already have plans for more, but I need I know you're out there! Thank-you =)


	2. What a Brat

Tannia leaned in closer to Turan as he opened the journal, trying to read in over his shoulder. He turned and looked at her rather sheepishly.

"You may not want to read this, Tan'," he said slowly, drawing away.

But the haremaid only laughed, scooting closer again. "Oh come on! I'm sure you wrote horrible things about me. I want to see! How old were you when you wrote this?"

Turan looked down, studying it for a moment. "I think I was eleven. And.. are you sure you want to see?"

This quieted Tannia for a moment as she stopped to think. "Then that was ten seasons ago.. meaning.. I would've been nine.."

Turan only looked silently at her for a few moments, before she met his eyes. "Well?" She said. "You going to start reading or not?"

He nodded and opened the journal again, holding it so they both could read.

****

Day 1

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Dad says I should start keeping a journal to talk about how all my days go. I said that was a girly thing to do because it was like a diary. Dad said it wasn't, and that he kept one when he was my age. I guess it's okay then, because my dad is the warrior. I still don't like it much though. Why should I write when I can be outside learning how to fight?

Dad says to write down what I'm thinking, too. So this is what I'm thinking: Why do I gotta write this stupid journal? It's boring and I've got ink on my paws. Dad says I'll want to look at it when I'm older. I know I won't.. I'm gonna be the warrior. I won't have time to worry about a stupid journal I wrote when I was a kid.

I also gotta write about my day. So today I didn't do much. I sparred with Dad like I do every day. Mum says Dad takes it too hard on me, and I should rest more. I told her it was okay, and it was very important that I trained. She only smiled at me, but I think she argued with Dad again when I left. Well, that's all I have to say. I guess I have to write again tomorrow. I hate this..

When they both finished, Turan only sat, shaking his head in disbelief. Tannia, however, was snickering away. "You were so spoiled, Turan. You really were. What a brat."

He stuck his tongue childishly out at her. "Maybe I just won't let you read anymore." He said, pulling the journal back into his lap, playing the part of the little brat.

She laughed, pushing him gently at the shoulder. "Oh come off it, Turan! You have changed a lot though."

"Okay okay." He said. "But let me read out loud if you don't care."

She nodded at him "Go right along. As long as you don't start censoring it just for my benefit." She noticed Turan give a small wince at that request, but nod in resignation.

He flipped the page and cleared his throat. "Day two.."


	3. Stupid Little Girl

****

***

Day 2

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Dad doesn't understand anything. It's not fair. He says I gotta be nice to Tannia. Oh yeah, Dad says I got to make sure to write who everyone is, too. 

***

Turan paused here, snatching a sideways glance at Tannia hesitantly. He was responded to with a vicious smile from her. "Go on, Turan."

__

***

__

Tannia is a stupid little girl.

***

He had to stop again as Tannia went into a fit of laughter. He looked longingly, almost apologetically at her. But he may as well had been making faces at a wall.

__

***

__

I said that to Dad, and he got mad at me and said that was very mean. That's why he doesn't understand. Tannia likes to watch me and Dad spar outside, but I want her to go away. She should go play with other girls and do Dress-Up or whatever dumb games girls play.

***

Tannia was still in peals of laughter, falling back to lay on the bed as she did so, her legs hanging over the side. She looked up at Turan. He had stopped, and she saw him looking uncomfortably over the rest of the page.

She nodded at him encouragingly. "Don't worry, I won't get mad at you." She said with a smile. "It was ten seasons ago, and-" Suddenly her green, amber-flecked eyes widened as realization dawned on her face. "Wait.. was.. was... my father still there?"

Turan only looked sympathetically at Tannia before looking back at his journal and continuing to read aloud. But this time he finished it off without stopping.

***

__

Tannia's dad is bad though, because that's what Dad says. Dad doesn't like Tannia's dad I know because I hear them arguing a lot. Tannia always cries and runs away into the orchard when her dad yells. She's such a baby. That's why I don't like girls. They don't understand anything either. I won't be nice to her, I don't care what Dad says. Older people always saying we gotta be nice to each other. Yah well, I bet they were mean and fought when they were kids, too. 

Anyways, I got other friends, and we played today. We got a club, and no girls are allowed. My friends are all boys, because girls can't be friends. My friends say if I play with a girl I won't get to be a warrior, because warriors don't play with girls. I asked about my mum and dad and how my dad is the warrior. They said because they're married, and that's different. They're right. I like my friends.

***

Now he stopped and looked slowly to Tannia where she lay beside him. Her expression was difficult to read. She looked both amused and disturbed at the same time. He sincerely regretted allowing Tannia to hear what was in his journal.

She only lay for a few silent minutes, staring at the ceiling. These were the kind of memories she had been trying to forget. But she realized now.. that perhaps it wasn't such a bad thing to remember. Yes, true, her childhood was not the best. But now.. being able to compare her life now to when she was younger. It was so wonderful!

With this resolved in her mind she said, still looking towards the ceiling, now with a small smile. "Yes... it's good to remember these things. I always loved to watch you and your father spar. It was always a secret hope of mine that I could have what you have.. that talent and skill. Watching you learn, even if I couldn't myself.. was a way to somehow get around that hope. But even now," she said with a larger smile as she flicked her gaze to Turan, who was already watching her. "I still love to watch you duel."

Turan gave a half smile, glancing away quickly. Tannia smiled, recognizing the action. He had averted his gaze in slight embarrassment from the way she had spoken. She recognized it so well, because she had used the same motion countless times before when Turan had been flattering her.

Before he looked back at her, he shut the journal. "Let's go back outside and get some fresh air.. out of this dust for a bit."

Tannia sat up quickly, placing her paw on his wrist to keep him from standing. "No! Keep reading." She insisted, with a begging look in her eyes.

"Please?"

*******

A/N- Okay.. so should I continue? Any suggestions? Is this too hard to follow, or are you keeping up? Can't do anything about it unless you tell me! =)


	4. Lost on Me

Tannia had drawn close, her eyes widening as she begged him. She could win a whole argument with her expressions. Especially against Turan. But Turan's expression was just as, if not more so, pleading than Tannia's.

"I don't really think this is something we need to read right now. It's kind of a.. well.. it isn't very happy, apparently." He finished off lamely.

"I told you," she argued. "This is good to remember. Do you realize how lucky I've been? I want to remember how everything has changed. Please."

He gave a small sigh, just looking at Tannia for a few moments. It was if he was sizing her up, when truly he was wondering if he even wanted to continue reading. He would not admit to it, but the memories of what were in his journal were more painful for him to hear than for Tannia.

But he nodded, and tore his eyes away from her. "All right then.. but let me read each day through completely. Don't make me pause."

She nodded, smiling at him, but she didn't move away. So even as Turan read aloud, she had a perfect view of the handwriting on the page. In fact, she moved only closer, laying her head on his shoulder.

****

Day 3

__

I hate parents. They mess up everything. Mum sent me to my room without dessert during dinner because I was laughing at Tannia. Stupid haremaid, she always gets me in trouble. Both our dads were arguing with each other again outside while we ate dinner. Tannia got all sad and pathetic and just sat there at the Great Hall table trying not to cry. So me and my friends laughed at her because her face looked so funny. 

But then Mum came over and cuffed my ear and said I had to go to my room. I can't believe it! She did it in front of everyone! This is not fair! None of my friends got in trouble like me. Now they're all gonna make fun of me tomorrow. If they do, then they won't get to be my friends anymore though. I don't need them because I'm gonna be the warrior. They are just jealous because I'm learning how to fight and they aren't allowed to even touch any weapons. Ha! Oh great.. here comes Dad to lecture me again.. got to go.

After he finished reading, he shifted slightly, and Tannia sat back up, looking at him with a smirk. "You were so mean to me. So your father lectured you about it?" She snickered a bit, shaking her head.

Turan had that apologetic look on his face again as he watched her. Tannia gave him a small, playful shove. "Oh lighten up! It was a long time ago. Besides, I was a bit of a baby, always going around cr-"

"No no," Turan cut her off quickly. "No you weren't. You were only nine and you had reasons.."

She studied Turan's expression for a second, then sighed, giving a shrug. "Well, I guess so."

There was a few moments of silence, then Tannia raised an eyebrow at him playfully. "Did you think you were going to avoid reading more? Go on.. I need something to make fun of you about, Mr. Perfect." In which she dutifully stuck her tongue out at him. It was fun for them to be childish to each other.

"I don't make fun of _you_," he argued, going to close the journal, but Tannia stuck her paw in it to prevent him from doing so.

She smirked at him. "Do you think all those jokes about my clumsiness are lost on me?"

He hesitated. Yep, she got him there. Without saying anything else, he returned his gaze to the journal.

"Day four.."


	5. Oh, the Injustice

A/N~ Okay, I just wanted to tell everyone that I REALLY appreciate all the reviews I've been getting. It means a lot to me. Also, if anyone is having problems with me taking too long to update.. let's just keep in mind that I started high school a couple weeks ago, so, yeah.. I will do the best I can to keep this updated! I'm shooting for every -or at least every other weekend for updates now. 

To Kelsey: Yes, Turan and Tannia are my own characters. All characters I use are mine unless I say otherwise.

Thank-you! =) 

~~~~~~~

Tannia allowed herself to get comfortable beside Turan again as he lifted his journal to read the next entry to date. But they had already had far too much privacy to be considered reasonable, so before Turan could continue reading, a light knock came on the gatehouse door.

Having a good feeling about who had knocked, Turan quickly stuffed the journal behind him, just as another young haremaid walked in.

This hare was considerably younger than the other two. She was five, or even more, seasons younger than them. Accompanying an unarguably short stature were a pair of rather stunning violet eyes, and the long white ears were tipped with a jet black.

A finely crafted smirk spread across the young maid's features as she watched Tannia slowly scoot away from Turan and turn her gaze in the opposite direction.

Turan cleared his throat. "Can I help you, Eula?"

"Well, I was going to ask you for a spar," her voice drew out in her familiar, 'I have blackmail!' tone. She stepped in and leaned casually against the wall beside the doorframe. "But apparently you are busy attending to other matters, eh?"

She flicked her becoming eyes to Tannia. "What's Turan hiding behind his back?"

Turan's eyes rolled in impatience to the ceiling as the two haremaids grinned at each other. Sometimes that young Eula really scared him. She was far too perceptive for one her age. His patience and compassion had really been tested ever since she had arrived at Redwall from Salamandastron. Even Turan could not deny how eerily clever she could be.

"It's a journal that Turan kept when he was a kid," Tannia replied quite readily, chancing a sideways look to Turan who was already looking back at her. "We're just reading through it now."

This seemed to amuse Eula to no end as she now returned her attention to Turan. "I've heard from a few reliable sources that you were quite the blockhead as a child."

"Well, you shouldn't believe every-" Turan had started to defend himself, but was quickly cut off by Tannia, who did not seem to have heard him at all.

"Oh, he was. Very stubborn, rude, obnoxious, close-minded..." Tannia could barely continue as she and Eula both went into a fit of giggles.

Turan could only look on in disbelief. He was being ganged up on by two females. Oh, the injustice. Oh well. Just to be fair, he *was* clearly outnumbered.

As Eula finally caught her breath, she walked over to Turan. As much as she loved a chance to make fun of him - as the opportunities were few and far between - she really did respect Turan over any other Redwaller. Not that he need know that.

"Well, can I see the jour-" but she didn't even finish her sentence before Turan was already shaking his head at her. There was a small hesitation, and Turan just knew Eula was working her whole scheme out in her head.

"Oh well. I'll see you later." But Turan was not fooled when Eula turned and walked back towards the door. Sure enough, she stopped before leaving and turned back to Turan. "I'm going to go tell everyone how their warrior kept a journal when he was young. I'm sure they will all be so interested. In fact, it will probably be kept in rec-"

"Fine, _one_ entry." Turan said reluctantly. Eula and her cleverness. He would most certainly get her back. The feeling of respect was mutual, however. Turan was always greatly impressed by Eula's skill, courage and determination. In everything.

"Lovely." Eula said, the same malicious smirk appearing on her face as she settled herself against the wall to listen to Turan read.

Tannia, not feeling as much in a cuddling mood with someone else in the room, simply sat back on her palms to listen.

Turan took the black-bound journal from behind him, and opened it. Flicking through a couple pages, he rested on one, then began to read.

** __**

Day 4

I wasn't allowed to spar with Dad today. He said because I was mean to Tannia when he said not to, I was on punishment today. He made me say sorry to her, too. So during breakfast I went over and said I was sorry for laughing at her yesterday and that it wasn't nice. She smiled at me and said it was okay. She didn't get mad or anything. Girls can be so weird.

He had to stop there for a minute as both the females had hit another eruption of giggles. He looked between the two of them, waiting for them to calm down.

"Turan, you were not the brightest of the bunch back then, were ya?" Eula snickered, offering the older male a playful wink. When he said nothing, Eula went on to take her turn on Tannia.

"Y'know what? Sounds like y'had feelings for Turan a looong time ago." She said with raised eyebrows. "I mean.. not getting mad at him.. smiling.. forgiving him.. Classic signs I'd say." She turned to collect Turan's impression of what she just said. God, she loved baiting these two.

Surprisingly enough, Turan had not gotten that impression of the journal entry before. He turned and looked questioningly at Tannia.

There was a pause as she glanced between the other two looking expectantly at her. She ran her tongue along her lips, then flicked her eyes to Turan. "Go on.. there's more to this entry, isn't there?"

With a small smile to himself, Turan nodded and looked back at the journal.

__

I had to wash dishes for punishment after breakfast and tea. It wasn't so bad because I was allowed to have some of the leftovers, which Mum never lets me do other times. I didn't have to do it after dinner, because Dad said I was good today, and because I apologized nice to Tannia. He said 'She's not so bad, huh?" I just shrugged. I still don't think he understands. I'm starting to think Dad wants me to be real friends with Tannia. Why?

"Now _there's_ a real complicated question if ever there was one." Eula, of course, was the one to add in her thoughts.

"Okay, that's one entry," Turan said, nodding at the younger haremaid. "You can be on your way now."

"A'right, a'right. I've made fun of you both enough for the time being. Come look for me later so we can spar." With that she went to leave. But she stopped yet again. "Leave you two alone again, I guess. I'm sure everyone would love to know how _cute_ you are together when you're alone."

Having said her piece, she disappeared.


	6. Quite a Cliffhanger

"Okay, now that she's gone.." Turan drew out, smiling at Tannia as he turned the page in his journal.

He opened his mouth, about to begin reading, when suddenly he stopped. His eyes were scanning the page, a slightly worried look on his face as he closed his mouth back.

Tannia scooted closer to him again, trying to catch what it was Turan was looking at. But when she came up against him, he angled the booklet slightly, so it was out of Tannia's vision as he read.

She sighed, reaching up to give his ear a small prick. "What's wrong with you?"

"Tannia.. let's please stop reading for right now.." Turan said. Tannia looked at him, surprised by the tone in his voice. He was basically pleading her.

"I told you not to worry about me, Turan," she said softly. She had lifted her paw and was stroking his wrist almost subconsciously. "What could possibly be so bad?"

"If you have to ask, you'll be surprised," he turned his bright blue gaze on her. This small action caused Tannia to take in a quick breath. She didn't know how he did it. But the saying that he could take her breath away was not only true, but literal.

She gave him a moment. Studying his eyes for a few seconds, she looked surprised again. "It isn't me you're worried about, is it?"

He bristled slightly. Never before had Tannia seen Turan this uncomfortable before... certainly never more uncomfortable than herself in any given situation. What was bothering him so much this time?

"Do you really want me to read it, Tannia?" He finally just asked pointblank. 

"Yes."

"Then I will." So yet again he let his eyes stray from her's and fall back onto the scrawl of writing in his lap.

**** __

Day 5

Today was a very bad day. I only need to tell you about what happened when it started getting dark because that's when everything happened. Me and Dad were having our last training session out in the orchard, and then we heard a scream. Both me and Dad went running to see what happened. I got there before Dad, though, and I could tell what happened.

He stopped, hoping Tannia had already caught one before he had to continue. Biting his tongue, he turned back to Tannia. When she caught his gaze, she nodded.

"Go on, I get it."

__

I knew when I heard it was Tannia, but I didn't know why. I saw her curled up on the ground against the wall. She was shaking and crying, and her arms were over her head like she was blocking something. I saw that it was her dad, because he was bad just like my dad had said he was. He was yelling at Tannia and calling her bad names, and he was shaking his fist at her. I could tell he had already hit her, because Tannia was crying in pain and fear both. I told him to stop and ran after him, because that's what a warrior should do. But my dad came up too fast and pulled me backwards to keep me from trying to fight. 

Tannia's mouth opened in disbelief at what Turan had just read aloud. "You tried to fight him? And you were eleven?"

"Yeah, well.." he said nothing more, wanting to get through this entry quickly. So he continued.

__

He whispered to me to get Tannia away and back to our room, and he would take care of Tannia's dad.

I was kind of mad, but then I saw Tannia there, and I felt bad even if she was just an annoying little girl. Dad took his sword and got him away from Tannia, and so then I ran over to her. I asked if she was okay, but she was still crying and her paws were still held up like she didn't hear me. So I knelt down so I could get closer and asked her again. She looked at me, and then looked around. My dad had taken her dad out of sight. She nodded at me to say she was okay, even though I knew she wasn't.

I told her she had to get up and come with me. I thought she would just sit there and be a baby about everything, but she nodded and tried to stop crying. She stood up and looked at me like she was waiting for me. I stood up, too and told her to follow me. I brought her to our room, and Mum quickly started taking care of Tannia. I came in my room and started writing this right after. I won't tell my friends, but I'll say here that I still feel bad for Tannia. I wonder what will happen.

Tannia didn't seem too upset by that entry. In fact, she sat back with a smile. "Hmm. I wonder. Quite a cliffhanger there, Turan." She said with a smile, looking at him.

But Turan wasn't paying attention. He was staring down silently at the journal in his paws. She was stunned to see the expression on his face. He wasn't upset. He was angry.

"Turan..."

"I hate him for that. Tannia, I hate how you were treated. It's not fair," he said quite obviously. Tannia raised her eyebrows at him. She was about to speak, but he kept going. "Maybe I didn't care as much then.. but now it would give me some satisfaction if I knew I had laid just one punch on him-"

"Don't say that," Tannia frowned. "You're better than he ever was."

"You never deserved that..."

"Turan, no one deserves that," she said quickly. She couldn't believe she was telling Turan this. He'd never seem so upset by something that happened in the past before. "But everything changed, you know that.. don't feel sorry for me if that's it."

He shook his head, closing his eyes. "I know, I know. I think it's bothered me more than it has you for the past few seasons. I just wish it could've been different."

"Well, don't wish.. I couldn't ask to have a better life now, so stop thinking about it." There was a pause, and she gently prodded him. "I said it changed.. so keep reading to remember how."

"I probably just called you more names..." he said slowly.

Tannia grinned. "Then give me another reason to make fun of you. At least this entry showed you had _some_ compassion for others. Go on.. Day six, Turan." She reached over his lap and turned the page for him.

~~~~~

A/N~ Wooh, two updates in two days! Let's give me a round of applause! Lol. Don't ever expect this again. This was a long weekend and I was really bored today. I should have my next chapter up next weekend. Thanks for reading. Please R/R!


	7. Worked Like a Charm

Reluctantly, he returned his attention to his childhood journal. He ran his paw down the page, as if smoothing out some unseen creases. "Right. Day six then..."

****

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Day 6

I found out this morning that Dad ran Tannia's dad out of the abbey. He wouldn't fight my dad, and instead he ran away from Redwall.

"Mmm... probably one of the best days of my life," Tannia thought out loud. "Even if I didn't think so then."

Turan looked up at her curiously. "What? What do you mean?"

"Well," she began slowly. "For awhile, I didn't understand why your father made mine leave. I didn't know that what he did was wrong. When he told me I owed him everything, and when he got angry and told me how useless I was, I believed him. When he yelled and hit me, I was sure I deserved it. I grew up thinking _you're_ family were the wrongdoers."

Turan had watched her as she spoke, and now he nodded. "I remember my father telling me something of those sorts. I seem to recall asking him once why you never ran or told anybody that you were being hurt."

When she only nodded and looked down, Turan continued reading.

Dad says he thinks he won't come back. Tannia stayed here overnight, and she didn't say much. She stopped crying but now she sits there and only moves to shake her head or nod if someone asks her a question. She didn't eat anything all day either. I remembered now that Tannia has no parents. Her mum died when she was born. I guess I see now. I would be very sad if my mum died, too.

"So you felt sorry for me?" Tannia interrupted his reading again. 

"I still do.."

Tannia hesitated. "This sounds horrible, but that was never something that really bothered me. I was too young to remember.. I never knew her. By the time I realized what it was I was missing out on.. your mother was taking care of me. You understand?"

Turan gave a small shake of his head. "No. But I'll stop feeling sorry for you because you want me to."

She looked at him for a moment, then smiled. "Good."

Dad says him and Mum will take care of her now, and I have to look out for her too. Oh well, I won't have to do anything anyways. She just sits there and stares at the wall. Dad says I should talk to her, but I don't know what to say. He told me to try anyways, but then my friends will all know that I was talking to a girl! And Tannia of all girls. Yuck. I can't win.

Turan smiled at the last part. "Yup, I got the raw end of every deal, didn't I?"

Tannia laughed aloud, pushing him at the shoulder. "Just _listen_ to yourself! I can't believe you cared so much about what others thought. You aren't like that now."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Like when you were flirting shamelessly with me in front of everyone just to watch me blush and be even more clumsy than usual."

"I never flirted shame- yes, I did, didn't I?" He grinned, as if proud of himself. "I did get some form of satisfaction at watching you trip every time I managed to make eye contact with you."

"Yes, I caught on."

"You still tripped."

"You never stopped!"

"You didn't flirt back!"

Which left both of them laughing.

"I suppose you figured out that I was always the one being teased, even though _you_ were always the one flirting." Tannia said, batting her eyes at him.

"No no.. everyone was teasing both of us, you were the only one bothered by it. Once they figured out how embarrassed you got, they picked on you more."

"And you never worried about stopping them?" Tannia asked challengingly.

"Of course not. I figured if they kept teasing you, you'd eventually get sick of it and stop being so shy."

"Uh-huh..."

"Worked like a charm," he smiled.

"Yes, well, I think you just got incredibly lucky."

"I think I'm so incredibly smart, it amazes even me," Turan replied, aware of Tannia trying to start up another friendly banter.

"I think if your head gets any more bloated you won't fit through the door."

Still grinning, he opened the journal. "Day seven..."

__


	8. Not the Other Thing

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Day 7  
Me and Dad are back to our regular sparring now. He says I'm getting very good and that I'm very advanced for my age. That made me feel very proud. Tannia started talking again, and she came out to watch us spar like she used to. I didn't tell her to go away this time, though. I tried to ignore her instead. She seems too interested in dueling for a girl, it seems like.  
  
"She seems to, it seems like," Tannia laughed. "You were a wonderful writer, Turan."  
  
"I was eleven."  
  
"Oh sure make excuses," she replied. "Anyway. Of course I was interested in dueling. I wanted nothing more then to be able to learn what you were learning."  
  
Turan rubbed the back of his neck in a guilty fashion, glancing sideways at Tannia. "I know that now. Shall I repeat 'I was eleven'?"  
  
_She was there when Dad told me how good I was. She agreed with him. I didn't say anything because my friends were around. It's embarrassing when Tannia is nice to me. My friends will think I actually like her. Like a friend.. not the other thing. But that's still bad._  
  
Turan smote his forehead with an open palm as Tannia simply offered Turan an amused smile, leaning back on her paws.  
  
"Pray, what other thing is that, dear?" Tannia asked quietly, mocking innocent curiosity as she batted her eyes at him.   
  
Turan glanced sideways at her, studying her as he contemplated his defense. Suddenly he stood and pointed an accusing paw at the haremaid.  
  
"Get out of my room! Girls have cooties. Just imagine if the other Redwallers saw me! I'd be banished forever!" He continued to point at her, beckoning her towards the door and playfully glaring at her through hooded eyes.  
  
Tannia stood up on the bed. She tipped Turan's sword from the hooks on the wall, took the hilt and gently leapt down. "Defend yourself, warrior." She drew out the last word as if she were making fun.  
  
Turan looked back and forth for a weapon to use. Coming up with nothing, he put on a pitiful pout to his opponent, allowing his arms to fall helplessly. "You wouldn't harm a defenseless Redwaller, merciful Tannia?"  
  
The maid blinked demurely at him. "Defenseless? Are you kidding me?"  
  
He hesitated, watching Tannia. Before Tannia could register what had happened, she'd been tripped neatly onto her back and disarmed. Blinking in disbelief, she looked up to see Turan standing over her with the sword.  
  
He smiled. "Yes, I was kidding." With his free paw he helped her up, then went and set his sword back up on the wall pegs.  
  
Turning back, he found Tannia sitting back on the bed with the journal in her lap, flipping it back open. Coming up to the page where they had left off, she let her paw rest on the page. "Day eight."  
  
Turan came and set next to Tannia, watching her. Smiling, Tannia read off the only five words that were scribbled across the page.  
  
_Too tired. I'll write tomorrow._  
  
"Hmm, why was Master Turan so tired do you ask?" Tannia smiled, turning to the one sitting next to her. "Let us see."  
  
She turned the page, settling down comfortably as she prepared to read the next entry. "Okay then. Day nine."  


******

A/N~ Umm.. I'm in trouble now aren't I? Eee.. Can I save myself by mentioning how flippin' busy I've been? No? Eh, sorry I've taken so long to update!! I'm truuuuly sorry. I'll try not to let it happen again. Although I've hit a wall here. My computer is being all PMS-y with this security log-in thing. So I have to use my bro's laptop to upload stories. Um.. If I don't upload again soon.. It's because my brother got pissed. Riiight.

On a happier note. My birthday happened since my last upload! Granted it was three weeks ago.. But I am now officially fifteen! Yay! *waves little flag and throws confetti*


	9. Just a Dream

__

Yesterday was busy. We had the Nameday Feast and there was a lot of competitions.   
  
"Ah, so that's why you were too tired to write then?" Tannia paused to glance over at Turan.  
  
He replied with a shrug. "Apparently. I don't remember which one this is yet."  
  
_They had an arching contest and I was allowed to play, too. My mum won though, she's even better than Dad with arrows.   
_  
Another pause was taken when Tannia snuck a sideways look at Turan, a smug expression on her face.  
  
Turan gave a sigh and smiled. "Yes, yes, you DID get your bloody skills from my mother. Mayhap I should've taken a few more lessons from her. Too caught up in swordplay."  
  
A highly amused smile played across the maid's face. "I didn't enter the last archery competition just so I wouldn't make a fool of you. You know I'm a ridiculously better shot than-"  
  
He pressed a paw to her lips, silencing her. "Okay. Don't need the entire abbey knowing you're a better archer than the resident warrior." He said with a cautious, yet playful air.  
  
Smirking, she returned to the journal.  
  
_There was also a race across the whole grounds, that everybody did. I got first place_.  
  
When Tannia paused yet again, Turan shook his head and fell back. "Yes ma'am. A smart comment?"  
  
Tannia leaned over him, brushing her paw along his cheek as she adopted an adoring look, also speaking in a soft, soothing tone. "I remember that race, sweetie."  
  
"Mm?"  
  
"I seem to recall it differently," she added. When Turan only looked questioningly at her, she continued. Taking a breath, she repeated something that she remembered being said. "I can't tell who it was that crossed the line first. This race will have to be called a tie. Our winners are Turan Cyano-"  
  
"-and Tannia Fellepian," Turan finished for her, covering his eyes when he shook his head again. "I remember that now. Did I really say that I won?"  
  
When he sat up, she tilted the journal for him to see what he had written so many seasons ago.  
  
He gave a wry smile. "So I did write that. I was so.."  
  
"Egotistical?" She offered, eyes widening innocently. "Selfish? Self-centered? Conceited? St-"  
  
"I think I get it."  
  
"Okay." She smiled.  
  
_There was lots of food! Everybeast said there was enough to go around for everybody twice and still there would be some left over. They were probably right._  
  
"As usual," the two hares said in unison. They exchanged smirks before Tannia finished off the entry.  
  
_Not much happened today. Everyone was too tired to do anything, so it was just a really quiet day. I didn't spar today either. I think I'm still tired from yesterday, so I'll stop here. Oh wait.. Happy Summer of the Late Bloom._  
  
She blew out as she stared down at the journal for a moment, her gaze unfocused in thought.  
  
"What's on your mind, Tan'?"  
  
She hesitated. "Tell me if this sounds weird," she cautioned. "But have you ever felt like.. when you have your memories and such.. it's as if they never really happened? It's as if I were watching it happen instead of being part of it." She paused, looking at Turan to see his reaction. To his surprise, he nodded.  
  
"I know exactly what you mean. As if it were some dream, right? You know you saw it, and you can see it, but it never really happened," he smiled.  
  
She looked at him curiously. "Exactly! So it's not just me? It's funny, too. You know it happened, and you know it's real.. or was real at one point. But after so long it's just a dream."  
  
"So is that how you feel about all this?"  
  
"Yes," she said softly. "It's just odd remembering it." She laughed. "Your journal has my memories in it."  
  
He smiled, this time he was beckoning her to continue. "Let's see what else we dreamed ten seasons ago."  
  
She nodded, turning the page.

*******

A/N~ I took a long time updating again, hehe. I still haven't even told my brother I've been uploading from his laptop, so shh. Haha, just kidding. I'm having a busy life with Drama and all. I have a little more free time on my hands now that the school play is over. Although I did just make the new upcoming one. XD. Bare with me you guys, I promise I won't abandon this story.

Anyway, these are two of my RPing characters, actually. In a recent RP Turan finally proposed to Tannia! And it was so cute, and sappy.. And yeah.. Lol. Now that I've officially wasted 30 seconds of your life with this note, you may proceed to review my story. Thank you =)  



	10. All the Basics

A/N~ Argh. Here we are finally. I hope you'll forgive me. Everything's been completely hectic lately. But I PROMISED not to abandon this story. And I try to keep my promises.

********

Tannia's emerald like eyes scanned the next page slightly before she began reading. Turan watched them light up with a mixture of curiosity and amusement. He nudged her gently.

"Care to share, Tan?"

"Oh," she blinked, shaking her head. "Right. Sorry." Trying not to smile, she began reading the next passage from the young warrior's journal.

****

__

Day 10

I can't believe it! Tannia wants to learn how to fight, too! I knew there was something weird about her. 

Turan smiled, lounging back comfortably. "I knew that one was coming up soon. I could never get over the idea of you wanting to learn how to fight."

__

Little girls aren't supposed to learn how to fight. Dad said he'd teach her, though. I can't believe any of this.. my dad should know better than that. And Mum, too! She gave Tannia her ash stave that she had learned to fight on herself.

Tannia hesitated there, as if trying to process something. "Would you say your mum's a good fighter?"

"Definitely."

"And yet... you still thought girls weren't supposed to learn how to fight?" She raised her eyebrows at Turan, challenging him.

"_I was eleven,"_ he replied defensively. "And... stop trying to reason with me."

__

This must all be a joke. I'm supposed to be the warrior. Tannia doesn't need to learn how to duel. She's probably just jealous that I get to be warrior, and I know how to fight and she doesn't.

Tannia was hardly able to finish the last sentence in her fit of laughter. She tossed the journal in Turan's lap and erupted in giggles. "_She's probably just jealous,"_ she crowed mockingly.

Turan put on a wry smile, letting her indulge in the satisfaction of making fun of him. She finally stopped and wiped the corners of her eyes, flashing a grin at him. "Guess you have nothing to worry about. You still became warrior."

When Turan didn't reply, Tannia sat quietly for a few moments, thinking again. "Ah-ha. That ash stave. A learner's weapon. I gave it to Eula. I didn't even think about it being passed down like that."

"Mm. I was hoping when Eula had a proper weapon and was finished with it she'd teach someone younger than herself." He said gently, having already flipped the page and started glancing over Day Eleven. "She's a way to go yet, though."

Tannia was about to reply but shut her mouth as a smirk crossed Turan's face. She hadn't realized he'd gone ahead in the journal. She took the moment to get him back. "Care to share, dear?" She asked smoothly.

He let out a sigh and shook his head with a smile. "I'm letting myself take way too much abuse from you. If anything, this one will get you." He paused and looked up at her, but she was already watching him expectantly.

"Okay. Here.. Day eleven."

__

Dad started training Tannia today. It's all the basics. I wasn't that bad when I started, but Dad says I was. He's just saying that because he's supposed to. Dad got angry a few times when I started laughing, and finally told me to leave them alone. I didn't care, who wants to hang around a little haremaid all day anyways? Not me!

Tannia took on yet another playful facade. "Oh my, Turan. What will the Redwallers think when they find out how much time you've been spending with me?" She said with a quiet, fetching air. "Surely you'll be banished! Stripped from your du-"

She was silenced when Turan put his paw over her face and nudged her backwards lightly. "Oh get on with you!"

She pulled his wrist down with her paws and smiled up at him, snickering a bit. "Okay, okay. Keep going."

__

I found my friends and we went out and played tag on the open grounds. It was fun, because I was the fastest of everyone there. But then they all started talking about what happened to Tannia. They kept saying I liked hanging around her, and I told them to shut up and it wasn't true. They kept going "Suuuuure" over and over again, so I left. Those idiots. I'll never talk to them again.

Tannia smiled at that, and Turan noticed a somewhat more pleased feeling about her than a mocking one as it usually was. She looked over at him after a minute. "I bet you that didn't last long. As much as you've changed, you could never hold a grudge."

"Agreed," Turan nodded. "I'm just too nice, aren't I? No wonder everyone likes me so much."


End file.
